Thursday, August 11, 2011

Heck no, I won't go!

A friend at church on Sunday said that he wasn't going to do EDGE Corps, which I took to mean that he would eventually do EDGE Corps. I only came to that conclusion because I made that same vow, as did many who were in my EDGE class. I have a general rule that I don't tell God I won't do something, because then He'll make me do it.

The rule's kind of a joke, but at the same time, kind of true. EDGE is one example. My (hopeful) post-EDGE career choice is another.

I once vowed not to ever work with junior high kids. It's just an awkward age and they're learning how to be complete jerks (if not learning, at least perfecting the art). Let's be honest, if we put junior highers in a locked room for a couple years, people wouldn't mind too much.

But right now, I'm applying to be a substitute teacher. I'm open to whatever grade will take me, but I'm hoping for junior and senior high jobs.

That's the weird thing about the way God works sometimes. Yeah, I have that rule to protect me from God calling me to something I don't want to do, but He hasn't. Yes, I did EDGE. Yes, I'm applying to work with junior highers. Yes, I already did work with junior highers this summer.

And I loved it.

It's a silly thing to try to protect yourself from God. He didn't spring me onto something I didn't want to do. He changed my heart. He gave me a heart for college guys. He gave me a heart for those boys in Sacramento. He gave me a heart to teach teenagers that are awkward and going through a lot of weird bodily changes and who probably smell funny.

I need to stop fearing that God will put me into something I'm not gonna want to do. If anything, I should just open up to the possibilities that God has for me, whether there possibilities I want right now or not. It's been good for me so far. Although I'm still waiting for the results of my vow never to be rich.